Iran's nuclear arsenal accidentally revealed

Alex Terrieur
La Lune de la presse internationale

BINLADENISBAD, IRAN

DEVELOPING STORY ...

In a surprising turn of international events on Wednesday afternoon, Iran accidentally revealed to the world that it had constructed nuclear weapons when an undertrained forklift driver had a sudden mishap. While transporting the nuke away from prying American and European satellites, the forklift operator made a wrong turn and exposed the weapon to American military intelligence nearby. The nuclear device failed to detonate, sparing large swaths of Iranian territory from instant nuclear devastation.

The consequences from this unprofessional blunder could further advance the case against Iran and isolate the country diplomatically. While the Europeans try to encourage Iran to give up nuclear weapons, Russia and China have so far opposed sanctions. The United States has stated through unofficial diplomatic channels that it doesn't really care too much what happens, because it's too busy thinking about all of the oil in Iran that it could possibly control if this issue can be hyped and used to scare other countries and political enemies.