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Monday, May 31, 2010

New $20 bill replaces Andrew Jackson's portrait with Michael Jackson

Grinan Barrett
La Lune de la presse internationale


The Bureau of Engraving and Printing unveiled the latest change to US currency Monday when it was announced that Michael Jackson would be honored on the new design of the 20 dollar note. The deceased singer will replace Andrew Jackson who has been portrayed on the bill since its initial design in the 1920s.

According to sources within the Bureau, the decision to use Michael Jackson's portrait was an easy one since the 20 dollar bill is also refered to as a "Jackson." Consumers and other currency users can then easily continue to use the "Jackson" without having to change their vocabulary.

"We felt this was a great way to honor the singer," said Bureau spokesman William Akemoore. "By using his portrait, we change the face of our currency while at the same time honoring African-Americans, white Americans, people with skin conditions, musicians, dancers, producers, and anyone with any kind of sexuality whatsoever."

Some inside sources have revealed to the La Rochelle Times that the government intends to print a large number of the new Michael Jackson notes in order to increase the money supply and stimulate economic growth.

"Michael could get people up and moving, and the new Michael Jackson twenty will get this economy up and moving," said the Congressional Economic Committee's Hugh Briss. "We intend to have so many of these printed, every American will soon be awash with riches and wealth beyond their wildest expectations."