"You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him understand the idea of subatomic particles that make up the basic building blocks of quantum mechanics underlying the innate vibrational nature of matter itself."

Friday, August 4, 2006

Sean Hannity releases new book


Candice Maistaille
La revue politique internationale

American political pundit Sean Hannity has released a gripping, forthcoming and fascinating look into his own personal philosophies in Deliver Us From Truth. Hard-hitting propaganda mixed with complete falsehoods and distortions characterize what can only be described as a blockbuster political powerhouse, chocked full of mensonges that will rattle the most sober politicians in Washington.

Hannity's style of continuing to promote - unabashed and without resorting to such inconveniences as facts - President Bush's policies reflects an attitude consistent with the bribed and brainwashed Republican minority. He certainly is a man of his word - he doesn't waver in style or form. "Once a true, die-hard neo-con, always a true, die-hard neo-con" is what Sean Hannity proclaims as his motto after delivering this cunning, cutting-edge fact-emptied masterpiece.

Whether it's advocating killing innocent children in Lebanon, or killing innocent office workers in the World Trade Center, readers can rest assured knowing that Sean Hannity's got their backs, even without the facts! Hannity's quick and shwitty writing style makes quick jabs at the left, while inspiring admiration of his shock and awe falsification tactics on the right.

For those of you who still believe the official government story on weapons of mass destruction, the War on Terror, Hurricane Katrina, the 2004 elections or anything else recent, pick this book up now!

Thursday, August 3, 2006

Ann Coulter diagnosed with Tourette Syndrome

Alex Terrieur
La Lune de la presse internationale


Self-appointed conservative pundit Ann Coulter was diagnosed on Thursday with Tourette syndrome at Bethesda Naval Hospital, where she had been brought after suddenly suffering a severe onset of the disease. According to sources close to Ms. Coulter, she was struck by a prolonged bout of profanity and racial slurs mixed with subtle sexual innuendos and overt death threats while preparing to be interviewed on Fox News Channel.

Doctors raced to assess Ms. Coulter's mental stability, in order to establish a legal status on her mental fitness given her recent statements wishing death on Supreme Court justices and accusing September 11th widows of enjoying their husbands' deaths. They determined that she could legally be classified as having Tourette syndrome, which would make her statements involuntary. Theoretically therefore, she could not be held liable in cases of death to Supreme Court justices unless she actually kills the judge herself.

Medical professionals have recently tried to establish a medical precedent linking Tourette syndrome with repeated instances of plagiarism. They were additionally intrigued by this example of Tourrettes in a female subject demonstrating masculine secondary characteristics such as an Adam's apple and large hands.

It is unknown whether news networks and other programs will continue to invite Ms. Coulter on their shows after her unexpected diagnosis. Fox News is expected to continue to feature commentary from "terrorism expert" and "best-selling author" Ms. Coulter. This would be consistent with their official policy of employing questionably sane television personalities.

Ms. Coulter did comment on the story to our reporters, however it has been deleted due to the indecency laws recently passed by the US Congress.